so far down

no longer thin
not starved and strong
i have lost all control

drowning in my past
in drugs and death and pressure

eating while it eats away
consuming so I might not be consumed
devouring as I am devoured

with each disgusting bite
rage, desolation and anxiety
give way to a restful, nauseous dead-zone
i am finally out of my head

but the reprieve is short

bursting with anguish
distended with grief
stuffed yet ever starving

each time farther from home
lonelier, sicker, sadder
and with ever diminishing hope