11.27.2008

Yeah Gratitude

This trip has been INCREDIBLE. My whole crew (all six of us) have been getting along well and I have definitely been able to satisfy the I-miss-my-fam craving. I even managed to get through Thanksgiving (we did ours yesterday) without overeating- I didn't even think that was possible.

Over the course of the week I have done about 30 miles of hiking in the mountains. I am a total hippie and love being "in touch with nature", not to mention having a way more fun form of exercise than the eliptical at the gym. Being here has definitely fed my spirit.

But... I still can't wait to get back. I miss Jeremy intensely. I am a little nervous about seeing him- I have only known the man two months, and we haven't seen each other in two weeks... it was one of those fall-fast-and-hard things and I am totally nervous it will somehow be different or ruined. As I sit here thinking about him I am simultaneously feeling an intense love and a desperation that borders on nausea. Oh, Kim, you have let yourself get in over your head once more. But I honestly don't think I could have stopped it if I'd tried. Haha, silly girl, sitting here thinking, "maybe this time I won't get hurt."

In short, life is great. I definitely feel centered and ready to get back to my life. I hope everyone has a fantastic Thanksgiving!

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(Because it is Thanksgiving, after all)
Gratitude List:

1. My whole family is together, healthy and getting along. I can actually say I have good relationships with both my parents and all my siblings.

2. I am in love with a brilliant and loving man who loves me back. I am so excited to see where life will take us.

3. I have a truly incredible circle of close friends. I can be myself fully around these incredible people, and I know they will always love and accept me (as I will them).

4. I am finally out of the ED woods. I am maintaining good healthy eating and exercise habits, and I feel great because of it. I never knew life could be so full and free of anguish.

5. I love my body. I really do. It is strong and healthy and attractive. I am within the healthy weight range for my age and height (albeit the high end), and I look and feel vital.

6. There is purpose in my life. My ability in neuroscience is rare, and I can use it to help people live fuller lives. Problems like mood and personality disorders isolate people, and I want to figure out the basis of these problems and how to correct them, thereby offering people the means to break out of their lonely struggles and connect with and love others.

7. I am not looking forward to the next stage of my life. I am happy with the now.

Mostly, this list is saying that I am greatful for love. I am greatful to have love for myself, share love with so many others, and help people who lack love find it.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey there... I love your gratitude list! Your energy is kickin'! Now I'm off to read more of you... Awesome meeting you Chicago!
~Dana

Katie said...

It is such a relief to read about someone who is recovered from an ED. I've been in recovery since March, and sometimes it seems like an endless, pointless battle. Thank you so much for your inspiring blog!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Coke Addiction Kinda Sucks said...

Hippies rule:D Glad to see you are in good spirits!

Apple Berry said...

This post and that list are both just like....hmmmmmm.... you know where you hunch your shoulders and scrunch our face ecause of loveliness and make a firly sigh, like seeing a baby.

If that makes sense. I love it and I love that you're feeling awesome. Yay for you! :D

V x

Caiti said...

This is all so great! Being in touch with nature can be the most spiritually fulfilling experience I think. And there is also such beauty in taking joy in the strength and health of your body. ;)

DaftDragon said...

Thanks! I'm just happy to finally be in control...

KC said...

oh, I'm so happy for you! you're inspiring!

Carol said...

A beautiful, beautiful blog.